You are the average
of the five people
you spend the
most time with.
— JIM ROHN, BORROWED LIBERALLY
It's not coliving. It's not a retreat. It's not Airbnb. It's three private spaces — a villa and two apartments — for people creating things, who want neighbours doing the same. The garden, the animals, the view that stays with you — most people don't realise they've been missing that until they get here.
The Ranch sits on a hilltop on Cape Panwa, looking out over the peninsula and the Andaman Sea. One road in, off Phuket's busy mainland — your own island, more or less. Two buildings, ten people, a permaculture garden, chickens, cats, and three dogs (one of them, Dave, on duty).
Phuket isn't cheap by Thailand standards, so the long-stay nomad scene mostly lands in Chiang Mai. The party crowd goes to Bali. The flexers go to Dubai. Panwa is none of those. Cleanest air on the island. Empty roads. Sea eagles at eye level from the balcony. Two of Phuket's top-five beaches five minutes away.
It's not for everyone. The jungle has snakes. The garden has spiders. The internet is faster than yours.
If you're still reading, apply.
Mike. Tech for 30 years.
Phuket for 12.
Grew up in the Yorkshire countryside. Farming family. Traveller at heart. Three years in a camper van around Europe recording football chants. Two years in South America. Five continents lived on. Twelve years in Phuket, five of them at The Ranch.
Sold my first business — Australia's number-two travel site — to Yahoo. Built FanChants, the world's largest catalogue of football audio. (The stadium chants in Amazon's Ted Lasso — that was us.) Now AI-ing the back catalogue into something different.
The Ranch is the latest creation. Over 500 creators have stayed here — carpenters, artists, permaculturalists, founders, the lot. Always creating. Three dogs, including Dave, who runs security.
- LOCATIONPhuket, Thailand
- HOMETOWNYorkshire, England
- CONTINENTS LIVED ON5
- YEARS IN PHUKET12
- YEARS AT THE RANCH5
- YEARS IN TECH30
- CREATORS HOSTED500+
- EXITSYahoo, ongoing
The other residents.
Three dogs, two cats, and one Dave.
-
Dave and Sid
Ranch security.
-
Poops
Learning disabilities.
-
Chainsaw
Resident asshole.
-
Tuxedo
Cool cat.
A little bit of filtering forgive me…
Builders, operators, the post-Dubai crowd.
- Tech operators looking for quality of life without the show
- Founders between things, taking 3–12 months
- Crypto / AI builders past their Chiang Mai phase
- Remote-first executives on a quiet sabbatical
- People with money, taste, and a project
Tourists, party people, anyone needing a front desk.
- Tourists. Backpackers.
- Party people
- Anyone who needs air conditioning
- Anyone who expects hotel-style front-desk service
- Anyone who can't handle the occasional spider, snake, or 6am birdsong
No front desk. Just help when you need it.
The Ranch is a residence, not a hotel — but residence doesn't mean fending for yourself. The things that should be easy are easy. None mandatory; all available. Leaving you the time to crack on. It works.
-
01
Laundry
Weekly, or on request.
-
02
Housekeeping
Weekly cleans, deeper on request.
-
03
Grocery runs & stocking
Send a list, find it in the fridge.
-
04
Vehicle rental
Scooter or car, fully insured.
-
05
Airport pickup
HKT to the hill.
-
06
Wednesday dinner or poker night
Villa table, ten seats. Show up, or don't.
-
07
Private chef
For dinners or events.
-
08
Massage & bodywork
Local practitioners we trust.
-
09
Visa & admin help
Introductions to the right people.
-
10
Day trips & charters
Boats, dive shops, islands.
-
11
Personal training
UFC-grade fight gyms 20 minutes away.
-
12
The unspoken
Ask. Most things are sorted with a Line message.
A world-class security detail.
(Can be bought with snacks.)
I haven't locked the door in five years. Dave alerts us to anyone who comes up the hill. Locks are available.
Obsessive, passionate and focussed?
Little bit weird / different?
Then you could have found a home.
ApplyConsidered reply within 48 hours. Stay longer, pay less.